We Don’t Know What We Are Asking

Photo: Gabbra Wooden Cup – Sueno Studio

He said to her, “What do you wish?” She answered him, “Command that these two sons of mine sit, one at your right and the other at your left, in your kingdom.” Jesus said to her in reply, “You do not know what your are asking. Can you drink the cup that I am going to drink?” They said to him, “We can.”

When I was nine or ten, I knew I wanted to be especially close to God. That was my desire, and in my innocence and naiveté, I thought that closeness would make me special to God. I remembered that as I read today’s gospel. Unlike James and John, I wasn’t hoping for power, but like them, I didn’t understand what being close to God and doing Jesus work would mean in my life.

Jesus knew, though. He found out, living his own life, that the more one truly reflects Divine Love in this world the more one will suffer. Jesus came to love and serve all. Obviously James and John and the other ten who were miffed by the brothers’ ambition, hadn’t understood what Jesus was trying to show them.

To grow closer to God, to become a more perfect reflection of the Holy One, to help bring the Kingdom, means becoming the least, the servant to all. It means enduring difficulties and suffering we do not expect. “Can you drink the cup I am going to drink?” Jesus asked. “Sure,” they might answer today. “No problem.” They answered so quickly. Jesus was right: They didn’t know what they were asking.

Neither do those of us who desire to follow Jesus. When we begin to understand, we also begin to learn that the only way to do it is with the help of the Spirit dwelling within. And as far as being special to God, I have learned that God does not have favorites. His Love and call to service is for all. ©2010 Mary van Balen

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