A Nun’s Ministry to the Transgender Community

A Nun’s Ministry to the Transgender Community

people-paintingA friend of mine, “Sr. Monica,” has had a long and graced ministry to the transgender community. Her presence with the people she knows speaks of God’s love and care for all of us, including those most of the fringes of society, the “invisible people,” as she called them.

Read her recent HuffPost blog post .

I hope, perhaps naively, that during the current Pope’s tenure, the church will finally recognize and remedy its failure to “be there” for these people who want simply to be who they have been made to be.

 

The Synod on the Family

The Synod on the Family

Posted on new.va

Posted on new.va

The Synod on the Family, called by Pope Francis, is into week two. The first document has been released. It is really a summary of what has been discussed thus far. The rest of the week will be spent with the bishops in small groups, refining the document that then will be released. As noted in NCR’s article, the document speaks in new tones of listening and recognition of the dignity of persons, and with mercy.

Still, I find myself bristling at the continued use of the word “failure” or “failed” in discussion of divorced people. Yes, truly listening to the concerns and realities of ordinary people is a step forward and perhaps heralds a coming openness to change in policies that do not reflect the love and mercy of Jesus. Still, as one who is divorced and who has worked with women in abusive situations, I must say that many times, leaving a marriage is not a “failure,” but a success. To stay in a relationship that has become oppressive, that no longer is life-giving, or that has become abusive simply to “obey the rules” is not something to encourage.

In some of these situations, if the spouses (or spouse) would pursue an annulment, the church might say the sacramental marriage was invalid, it never happened….But many do not pursue such a course. The church should respect the persons involved, not calling them failures, but supporting them as they move on.

A topic completely missing from the discussion is that of the transgender community. (Read entire document here.) Often overlooked, the “T” in “LGBT” needs to be considered. Many transgendered people have left the Catholic church after enduring humiliating experiences including the suggestion that they be exorcised for the demon within. The lack of understanding of current medical and psychological knowledge about this reality is a glaring omission.

Today, the issues of the transgender community are becoming more and more visible in the media and social consciousness of the reality has grown. The Roman Catholic Church needs to follow that lead.

The current movement is hopeful. We’ll see how far the Spirit leads and how far the Church follows.

Song of Songs: God Waits with Desire

Song of Songs: God Waits with Desire

Song of Songs IV by Marc Chagall

Song of Songs IV by Marc Chagall

Here he stands behind our wall,

gazing through the windows,

peering through the lattices.  Song of Songs 2

 

These words from today’s readings became my Lectio word for the day. This book is full of vivid images, and I liked to imagine God lingering behind the walls I construct, gazing at me. Seeing what is good and beautiful and waiting for me to return the gaze.

I know how love and desire can fill a gaze. I know the feeling of love bursting out, pouring through my eyes upon the one I love. I have felt the warmth of such a gaze and the fullness it creates within my heart. I have known this with another. I have known it with God.

Imagine, the Holy One, standing near, beholding you and your unique beauty. The Holy One calling you out to yourself as well as to the One Who Made You. In God’s eyes you are magnificent. Love, God’s and our own, helps us to see the beauty with as well as within those around us. Such love helps us see the beauty of creation.

Pondering these words makes me pray for an open heart, not only to receive Love, but to pour it out onto others.

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Transgender Day of Remembrance

PHOTO: TransOhio

PHOTO: TransOhio

Today across the country and the world, people stop to remember those transgender persons lost to violence fueled by transphobia and hate. I join my voice and prayer with others commemorating this day for an end to such senseless violence. Ignorance and fear are the sources of such violence. Like racism, such attitudes are sometimes learned at home, or sadly, in church. No matter where it begins, these attitudes have their root in dividing the world into “them” and “us.” Into “people like me” and “the other.”

If you don’t know much about transgender people, today would be a good day to learn something. You will find that transgender people are just that: people. When we get down to it, people are more alike than they are different. Today, say a prayer for those who have been lost. And say a prayer for those whose ignorance and fear perpetuate discrimination and violence against transgender people.

Here are some links to sites that contribute to better understanding of these people and the challenges they face:

 

Lana Wachowski’s acceptance speech for HRC Visibility Award. Acclaimed director of movies such as the Matrix Trilogy and       Cloud Atlas, her speech is one of the best on the topic I have ever heard. You won’t be the same after you hear it.

JamieAnn Myers Blog on Huffington Post states that over 238 trans people were murdered world wide last year. Her blog lists some struggles a transperson meets just going about ordinary daily activities.

Transgender Day of Remembrance 2013 (TDOR) A post from GLADD that includes a link to find TDOR events in your community.

Wikipedia’s entry on Transgender Day of Remembrance presents the history of this day as well as links for further information.

 

 

I Am Back!

I Am Back!

Coming home!

Coming home!

 

 

 

I have not posted new blogs since late September. The reason? Knee replacement surgery! However, I am now home, healing, and retuning to writing, blogging included. So, excuse the absence and look for new blog posts!

Dooky Chase: Great Food and New Orleans Hospitality

Dooky Chase: Great Food and New Orleans Hospitality

Dooky Chase

“Try Dooky Chases” my friend texted me when she learned I was going to New Orleans. I almost didn’t. I was tired from a day at the CALGM conference and had missed everyone else going to dinner. Walking down the streets in the French Quarter and choosing one of the countless places to eat just a few steps away from the hotel would have been easier.

I had Googled “Dooky Chase” and read a bit about it. Founded in 1941, it was famous for the amazing food, it’s chef, Leah Chase (ninety years young), and her collection of African American art that covers the restaurant walls. Important meetings of civil rights leaders had been held there during the 60’s. It was one of the only places blacks and whites could eat together then. A pope and US presidents had dined there as well as famous artists, musicians, and sports figures. How could I not go?

Well, it was a cab ride away,  and the longer I stretched out on my bed and read about the place, the sleepier I got.

image“Mom, you have to go,” my daughter encouraged me over the phone after I told her about it.  So, I pulled myself up, talked to the hotel concierge who checked to see if a table would be available, found a cab, and made the short trip across town. How glad I am!

Dooky’s was even better than I imagined. An unassuming brick building, restored of two long years after Hurricane Katrina, offered not only great food (I had the seafood platter but questioned my choice after smelling the fried chicken delivered to the table next to me…I wasn’t disappointed in my choice once I took a bite!) and art, but also New Orleans hospitality. After holding a couple of conversations across the aisle with other patrons, I was invited to join the fried chicken table by one of its guests whom I would soon learn was Tony.

The conversation was lively. I felt like one of the family. Not surprising according to our young waiter.

“When you’re in Norlens,”  he said, “you’re family. We eat together and party together…”

“And go through hurricanes together,” Maria added.

Me, Susan, Tony, (from top)Clint, Maris, Miss Leah, David

Me, Susan, Tony, (from top)Clint, Maris, Miss Leah, David

They shared desserts with me (praline bread puddin’ and peach cobbler) and then Tony said, “She’s gotta meet Miss Leah.” everyone nodded.

That’s how I found myself in the kitchen, shaking hands with the Queen of Creole Cuisine, Leah Chase. The chef, author, and television personality was holding court in her kitchen where grateful customers and admirers came to thank her, ask her to sign one of her cookbooks, give her a hug and bask in her gracious smile.

My new friends insisted on waiting with me for twenty-five minutes until my cab arrived. While we waited I talked through a door into a room that held even more wrt work. An eclectic collection, it deserves to be catalogued.

“This is about one-third of her collection,” one of the waiters, Oscar, told us as he continued getting the restaurant ready for the next day’s business. “It is in the process of viewing catalogued.”

We wandered through more of te restaurant taking thin stained glass and sculpture. Oscar showe us one of his favorites, an Elizabeth Catlette print of Harriet Tubman.

“Dooky’s is a museum,” I thought. The staff were singing and doing a dance step or too as we waited. The cab arrived. After hugs and waves, I got in and returns to the hotel. I had had dinner, met new friends, enjoyed artwork, And met an amazing woman who has played a significant role in our history.

I walked into my room, flopped on the bed and thought about the people at the CALGM convention, working for civil rights for the marginalized in our society. Quite a night. Quite a road ahead.

 

 

Truth Tellers

Truth Tellers

Jeremiah, Jerusalem, prophet, Bible

Cry of the Prophet Jeremiah on the Ruins of Jerusalem by Illya Repin 1870

King Zedekiah was a bit of a “waffler” when it came to Jeremiah. First, he gave the prophet over to those who wanted to put him to death. “He is demoralizing the soldiers who are left in the city,” they princes told the king. Jeremiah was proclaiming the truth he had heard from God and predicting the fall of Jerusalem. Not welcome news.

After the leaders had lowered Jeremiah into an empty cistern full of mud, a court official came to the king and pleaded for Jeremiah’s life. The king told him to go, get help, and pull Jeremiah up out of the cistern before he died.

Ahh…such is it with truth tellers: Reviled and revered. In and out of favor. Then and now.

To be a truth teller is to risk ridicule, abuse, even death. We have seen in out our own day. Truth tellers like Martin Luther King, Jr and Sr. Dorothy Stang gave their lives for speaking the truth. Countless others who stand up to injustice pay a high price.

Today’s gospel made clear the risk one takes in being a follower of Jesus: “Do you think that I have come to establish peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. ” LK 12, 51. Sounds harsh. Not what we expect. But, when you think about it, when one stands firm in truth, resistance follows. Especially from the powerful. It is rooted in fear.

“It is not power that corrupts but fear,” said Nobel Peace Prize winner, Aung San Suu Kyi. “Fear of losing power corrupts those who wield it and fear of the scourge of power corrupts those who are subject to it.”

We see fear at work in our society today, working to silence those who speak out against injustice. Who would shine light into dark places we would rather not see. Who give voice and presence to the marginalized among us. One example is the swift and ferocious push back against the passage of the California bill that gives protection to transgender students. Those whose voices protest the loudest are those who are uniformed and filled with fear. [Read more…]

Need for Education: Transgender

Need for Education: Transgender

people-painting

Response to California’s new law (the first in the USA that provides statewide protection for trans students) makes something clear: The public needs education on what being transgender means. As I listened to news casts and read comments, one word kept jumping out at me. “Choice.” The perception of many is that trans people, whatever their age, “choose” to be transgendered.

Listen to CNN’s Brooke Baldwin who, while maintaining a neutral stance, began yesterday’s News Room segment with a summary of the new law stating that the trans student’s rights are “just based upon which gender a boy or girl chooses to identify with.” One of her guests, Randy Thomasson, president of anti-LGBT hate group, Save California, responded to her question about what he would do if he had a daughter who identified with boys by suggesting that such a child’s sexual confusion could be the result of abuse or abandonment. I am not taking issue with the helpfulness of professional counseling, but with the idea that one “becomes transgender” as a result of abuse in whatever form. In other words, it’s a choice. It’s “curable.”

California #AB1266, transgender rightsThe reality is, transgender persons, like all of us,  are born with an deep innate sense of gender. Their body doesn’t match.

CBS NewsOnle’s report addressed the issue. While the opening statement still included the idea that school children choose their gender, the reporter, John Blackstone, interviewed an eighteen-year-old transgender student, Logan, and brought up the question of choice. Logan, of course, was clear. No one would choose such a life. No. Being transgender is not a choice.

Perhaps what will most help dispel the misconception that people choose to be transgender is what Masen Davis, Executive Director of the Transgender Law Center, mentioned on the CNN report: Getting to know a transgender person.  “I realize that not everybody in America has had the opportunity to get to know a transgender person…,”  Masen said. Fear and hatred are fueled by ignorance. Whether through getting to know a transgender person, watching stories of transgender persons on television specials or online, or reading those stories in books or other media, one of the first things a person will learn is being transgender is not a choice.

Showing God’s Merciful Face

Showing God’s Merciful Face

Fountain, Rome, Italy, Egyptian Obelisk

Fountain in Rome
PHOTO: Mary van Balen

Fountains are everywhere in Rome. Many famous. Many not. The amazing thing about them is their water is fresh, clean enough to drink. “Keep your water bottle,” my daughter advised when she saw me draining the last drop early in the morning. “We can refill it at the fountains all day long.”

How right she was. People of all ages crowded around the fountains, catching streams of clear, cold water in their plastic bottles. At some places, water in a bottle was not enough, and people put their heads under the spouts or stepped into the shallow pools to find relief from August heat.

I have to hand it to Pope Francis. Rome in August is not for the faint-hearted. His choice to forgo a month in the summer residence takes stamina. So did his trip to Brazil for World Youth Day and his good humor during a long press conference aboard the plane on his return to Rome.

What I find as welcome as water pouring out of Rome’s fountains is the kindness and humility coming from the heart of the new pope. While not signaling changes in Church teaching on homosexuality, which many hope will come eventually, Pope Francis shows God’s merciful face when confronted with the issue.

Responding to questions about the possibility of discovering a gay priest in his service, he said “Who am I to judge a gay person of goodwill who seeks the Lord? You can’t marginalize these people.”

Vatican, Saint Peter's Square

Fountain in St. Peter’s Square, Rome
PHOTO: Mary van Balen

Later on, according to an AP article quoted in a post by Paul Brandeis Raushenbush on Huffington Post’s Religion page, he took reporters to task for asking about an aide who had beensuspected of involvement in a gay tryst ten years ago. That was not an issue of criminal behavior, as abusing children. It was a matter of sin, he said. When someone sins and confesses, God both forgives and forgets.

“We don’t have the right to not forget,” he said.

Refreshing.

Good at Heart

Good at Heart

Medgar Evars, Civil Rights Leader I was a young teenager when civil rights leader, Medgar Evers, was assassinated, shot in the back, while returning home from a community meeting. Fifty years ago, today. His widow, Myrlye Evers-Williams, reflected on the event saying, “We are cursed as human beings with this element that’s called hatred, prejudice and racism,” said Evers-Williams, now 80. “But it is my belief that, as it was Medgar’s, that there is something good and decent in each and every one of us, and we have to call on that, and we have to find a way to work together.”( “Quoted in June 11, 2013 AP article”)

[Read more…]